


can't you see that you're on my mind?

by tipstaff



Series: running in the shadows [4]
Category: The X-Files
Genre: M/M, i'm posting this literally seconds before my english class starts, wish me luck on this test
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-26
Updated: 2017-09-26
Packaged: 2019-01-05 20:28:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12196860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tipstaff/pseuds/tipstaff
Summary: Forest green makes Mulder's eyes pop.





	can't you see that you're on my mind?

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this instead of studying for the three tests i had today. enjoy it.

“I’m cold.”

Mulder glanced at Krycek. “You’re always cold.”

Krycek shrugged. “It’s fucking cold.”

It was around seven in the morning, about a week after they had left D.C., and everything else, behind. They were parked on the side of a country road, more gravel than pavement. Krycek couldn’t remember precisely, but he thought they might be in New York. Krycek was huddled in on himself against the back door on the driver’s side, Mulder on the passenger side. Both had been trying to get a few hours of sleep in before they had to keep driving. Scully, exhausted as well, sat curled up in the front passenger seat.

Krycek rubbed his eyes. “I’m gonna go piss. Don’t leave without me.”

Mulder didn’t answer. Krycek opened the car door and stepped out onto the loose gravel that dusted the pavement. He shut the door quietly so as not to wake Scully.

He walked out into the barren field they had parked next to and wondered what was usually planted here. He wasn’t sure what kind of farming happened in the Northeast. Not that it was important. When he was far enough from the car, he decided he really would take advantage of the chance to pee before they hit the road again.

Afterwards, he kept walking. There was a host of shrubbery and small trees, far off to his right, that slowly led to the treeline of a forest. He slowly wandered toward them, knowing that it would be a while yet before Scully awoke and they continued their North-bound trail. His boots squelched faintly in the mud and dead plant material, and he was struck with a sudden bone deep longing for the solid sidewalks of Washington D.C. Where would he be if he hadn’t made that fateful deal with the Syndicate? Probably nowhere near Mulder, if he was being realistic. He would never have had the courage to approach the older man if it wasn’t for the job. But he liked to pretend he’d be Mulder’s partner still, and he would turn around and walk back to the car and they’d finish their drive up to some dinky little town in New Hampshire that Mulder thought was infested with werewolves or something. Instead, when he returned to the car, he’d be in for ten more hours of being pointedly ignored from the front seat.

Speaking of: the shunning he was being put through was starting to take its toll on Krycek. He knew he deserved it, and therefore didn’t argue about it-- but that didn’t change the fact that watching Mulder and Scully interact was like a knife to the gut for him. They were so comfortable with each other-- too comfortable to just be friends. Krycek had underestimated their level of intimacy when he’d mistakenly thought he had a chance with Mulder. Looking at them together at the temporary shelter the Lone Gunmen had offered them, seeing them hugging, touching, crying on each other, simply reaffirmed what Krycek already knew: even if Mulder could someday forgive him for what he’d done to their lives, he would never want him.

Krycek was startled out of his reverie by the sound of twigs snapping behind him. He turned to see Mulder approaching him, moving too-long branches of bushes out of his way.

“Communing with nature?” Mulder’s voice, surprisingly, held a humorous note. Krycek decided not to discard it so quickly.

He smiled bashfully. “Just figured I’d give you and Scully, you know-- some alone time. I can only imagine how annoying it is, having me tagging along, not having any time to yourselves.”

Mulder looked up briskly from the leaf he was pulling off of a shrub. “What? No, no…” he smiled a bit, lifting the leaf and ripping it apart in between his fingers. “Me and Scully, it’s not like that, with- um, with us.”

Krycek kept his gaze on Mulder. “But… you want it to be?”

Mulder looked mildly uncomfortable now. “No, uh… not really. I love Scully, but, uh… like a sister. You know?”

Krycek couldn’t answer for a moment.

“She’s my best friend, it would be weird. Plus, I think she’s a lesbian.”

Krycek’s eyebrows rose. “Oh. Um. How do you, er, feel about that.” God. What a dumbass fucking response. Never talk again.

“I don’t feel anything about it, I don’t care.” Mulder had discarded his leaf and broken an entire small twig off of the bush, now. “I mean, I don’t even-- I prefer guys, anyway.”

Krycek didn’t know if he was breathing. “Prefer?”

Mulder shrugged and spun the twig between his hands. “Yeah, I mean, I like girls, I just like men better.” He tossed the stick into the shrubbery to his left and turned back to Krycek.

“Oh, come on, Krycek,” he said, apparently in response to Krycek’s expression. “Don’t tell me you’re… bothered by that.” He looked very uncomfortable, now, and Krycek was still seeing stars.

“No, no! Not at all! I’m- no, no way. You-- it’s fine. Really.”

Mulder gave Krycek a look that said something like ‘okay, chill’ and said, “Alright, well, I’m gonna… head back, I guess.”

Krycek nodded too quickly. “Yeah, I’ll go too. With you.”

They walked in silence, trudging through the muddy field, until the car came back into view.

“By the way,” Mulder said. “If you think you’re off the hook now-- just ‘cause we had that private confessional back there-- you’re wrong. You’re still a piece of shit, I just figured. You know. Since we’re gonna be practically living together, er, indefinitely… I figured you should know.” And he shrugged again, awkwardly.

Krycek nodded as they both rounded the car. “Sure,” he said easily. “Thanks… for telling me.”

Mulder gave him another weird look as he settled into the driver’s seat. Krycek leaned back into the headrest of his own seat just in time to see Scully’s red hair move from her comfortable position and hear her say, “What time is it?”

**Author's Note:**

> comments are always welcome!! (:


End file.
